I was at my Mom's Group this morning when the Warrior called. Our burglar alarm was going off -- the hallway motion sensor had been tripped.
So I called JC to have a look since I was about fifteen minutes away (and she lives right across the street). She didn't notice anything weird.
I had put Sasha in our bedroom, with the door closed, when Little Man and I left the house. The motion sensor is outside of the bedroom. I had also left the door to the deck open, since it is a nice day, it is on the second floor (third if you count the garage), and there are no alarm sensors on the sliding doors.
The majority of burglaries in our neighborhood happen during the day. So I felt that it was a real possibility that someone had broken in.
I was imagining someone climbing up to the deck and getting in, only to be foiled once they left our bedroom and tripped the alarm. I worried about Sasha's safety. I worried about dealing with a house that had been broken into.
But at the same time, I thought, it's just stuff.
When I got home, I called the neighbor who works out of his home to come inspect. He brought a large sledgehammer and cleared the premises for me.
Everything was as it should be. But for some reason, I feel scared.
Feeding Little Man his lunch, I felt the emptiness of our home around me. It's just him and me here. Sasha is no help -- she would likely lick an intruder to death before she even barked. She's smart like that. Heh.
It's instances like this that make me realize that I'm the parent. I don't have my Mom or Dad to rely on when something scary happens. It's all on me. I need to react a certain way, maybe not so much now, but when Little Man is older, so that he feels secure and like I'm the parent.
What makes YOU the parent? Are there times that the parent in you has taken over automatically? Or have you had to turn the parent on to respond/act accordingly?
10 comments:
The fact that I'm in charge of the Kaiser's social security card freaks me out.
Oh yeah, I live it since my better half travels so much. I really have to be in "Condition Yellow" to "Condition Orange", all the time!
Like, when the truck broke down, earlier this week, I called Mike for advice but in the end if was all on me to handle it.
Other times are when the kids get hurt or are sick. Parent-mode, all the way!!
I'm with you on the alone thing. When spouse is away, I revert to child at night, even turning on a night light...for me! Sometimes the parent kicks in when boy child puts himself in danger. That would be the auto mode. But, most of the time I still see myself as a 14 year old in braces, and I don't know how I got here? Know what I mean?
We also have the alarm system and religiously use it...
It makes me feel equally parental...
By the way...what set off the alarm...did you explain that?? Did I miss it?
Bradley
The Egel Nest
Eep, scary. *HUGS*
So scary. I would be freaking out, too. Hope that you are feeling better now.
I hate being the parent in cases like this. While RxMan doesn't travel, he does work 12 hour shifts which means he is gone 13-14 hours a day when he works.
I don't like dealing with workmen, cablemen, etc. I hate dealing with insurance companies and school officials. But, most of all, I hate having to kill the bugs. That is when parenting really sucks. Killing the giant spiders that appear in bathtubs- eeek!
We just bought a new place (moving from a highrise to a townhome). I am all about the alarm, I will miss the feel of a doorman between me and the world.
Wait a minute...I am the parent? Gaaahhhh!
When my husband was working out of town and my kids were much younger (range 0 - 3) I would sleep with the tv on when he was gone. Sometimes it would end up freaking me out because at midnight, Cops would come on. Nothing like being sound asleep and waking up because you hear sirens and then see red and blue lights flashing. I also used to have one of the kids sleep with me. It didn't matter that they were only 1 and 3, it made me feel better.
situations like that make me glad I have dogs that bark, alot. The same barking that I usually yell at them for is the sort of thing that makes my home not likely to be burglarized.
Where i get scared and revert to more of a child is during storms. This is where I need to work on my reactions so Boog doesn't grow up scared of storms.
I'm alone with my kids right now. I am until tomorrow and last night when I went to bed alone I felt more the parent and scared then I do when I have my husband here with me.
The responsibility if all mine when I'm alone. I can't ask for help. That's when it hits me most--and overwhelms me most.
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