7.28.2008

My Child, He Breaks My Heart


Heartbreak is knowing your child will be born prematurely, cutting short your time for hoping and dreaming about your baby.

Heartbreak is accepting the fact that your child will be a preemie and that there is nothing you can do to change that fact.

Heartbreak is letting go of all your hopes and excitement for your baby and instead, replacing them with worry and grief.

Heartbreak is seeing your precious baby covered in wires and IV's at only a few hours old.

Heartbreak is watching your child struggle to breathe -- really struggle -- with his chest fitfully expanding and then collapsing.

Heartbreak is having your five month old child confused for a two month old.

You know how I squash that heartbreak? With moments like this:

********
Not to cheapen my post or anything...(heh)
*This is part of the http://www.bloggygiveaways.com week long celebration!*

Preemies are too small for Baby Bjorns - so ended up using a Mei Tai and a sling for my Little Man.
I have this beatiful handmade-by-a-Mama (NOT me, a professional sling maker, lol) ring sling to give away. Leave a comment that you want it and I will give it away on Friday.  Thank you to all of you leaving comments who don't want the sling -- I love you all!
The fabric looks like this, a really pretty neutral:

101 comments:

Mr Lady said...

AWWWWW! I WISH I needed a Mai Tai, but alas, mine are almost bigger than me. But that picture? AWWWW!

Loralee said...

I have no idea what that must have been like to go through. Hellish in a lot of ways I bet. Still, look at that GORGEOUSNESS you have.

That sling looks rad, but I will pass on the entry as I don't think my 9-year-old will fit in it and he is my "Baby"

~Babychaser~ said...

I love ring slings!!! I would love another one. :)

babychaser.blogspot.com
babychaser@gmail.com

Miss said...

What a great post. I wish I needed that sling!

Red Lotus Mama said...

I love the picture! The sling looks great and I know someone who loved theirs. My 3 year old is pretty tiny for her age, but I don't think I can use it with her now!

maggies mind said...

I can't even imagine, but I do love the picture. No need to enter me in the giveaway (unless you have one for cats =^..^=, of course).

abritdifferent (Siobhan) said...

Hi, first time visitor here. Not really commenting for the giveaway, but just cos. Saw your plurk and had to come see. I was born 8 weeks early to, but that was back in '74 and my Mum thought I wasn't going to make it.

Great post. Put my Mum's feelings about it in perspective for me. She said she'd sit beside me when I was asleep and just keep her hand on my chest all the time.

Octamom said...

My 14 month olds are too big, so give the love to another--but your post is SO sweet--many good things to think about when talking to a mom of a preemie...

confession--I saw a mom with a tiny baby a few days ago and told her what a sweet little new one she had. She responded by telling me that the baby was actually 6 months old. I felt so bad--what was meant to be a compliment and a celebration of her child ended up being a painful reminder to her of the things you posted about above. I told her again the baby was beautiful and moved on--ouch! It feels a little better to let a mom whose been through it that sometimes people blow it--but sometimes we are well-intentioned...
Blessings~

Beth said...

Hi, I don't want to enter your giveaway because my kiddos are now 6 and 18 (years, not months!). Just wanted to tell you that your post touched me, and I know where you're coming from. Both of my kids were born at 33 weeks; my daughter spent 17 days in the NICU and my son was there for a month. I remember putting my daughter in her "Snugli" (what we had instead of Baby Bjorns back in the day) and suddenly realizing there was NO WAY that was going to work. It would have been great to have a neat adjustable sling back then. Instead I got really good at going through life doing everything one-handed...and she got good at hanging on like a little monkey. :)

Hang in there, it gets better. It took me a long time to get past focusing on my "failure" to do pregnancy "right", but eventually I realized I could enjoy being a darn good mom. Birth is only one day, being Mom is forever.

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

I don't need the prize either, but I sure can relate to this post.

MommyK said...

I'd love the sling, but I'd be giving it to a friend who just had a baby. I have a Maya Wrap and it was wonderful for nursing hands free while making grilled cheese for my second child. And I use it now to carry the baby, now 20 months, on my hip or bacl

chilihead2 said...

I'm happy you're participating in my giveaway carnvial! Don't forget to link back to http://www.bloggygiveaways.com, though. It's one of the few "rules" of the game. ;)

Kim said...

Seriously, that picture.. holy crap is it perfect..

I will pass on the sling..but tell you that this post made me smile because of your happy ending.. :)

leigh said...

i have two friends who had babies at 29 weeks and fortunately both are doing amazing now at 2 and 3 yrs old. best of luck.

i'd love to win



thanks

Karen said...

You're amazing. Children can break your heart in ways you didn't even know were imaginable. And yet the love we feel because of them so outweighs the heartbreak that we think nothing of it.

Cathy said...

I don't think I want the sling (or do I? Could Liam fit it in? I still haven't gotten a new one yet)
Anyway... Beautiful post - and beautiful picture.

Mrs. Sara said...

I can has slingz? Kthxbai!

My first baby is due in November, so we could definitely use it! Thanks for the giveaway!

saharagreen at gmail dot com

Sandy said...

Oh oh oh! I'm in!

Catwoman said...

What a fantastic picture of a fantastic Little Man!

VDog said...

Thank you all so much for leaving me such wonderful comments. You are truly touching my heart.

It seemed like this giveaway was a good fit for the post, but yes, I would love it if you commented on the actual post itself, and not just the giveaway.
But you don't have to! Fair is fair. ;)

ChiliHead2: thanks for the reminder; I totally spaced on that. Meant to. Now it's up. :D

Jenty said...

I really can understand that heartbreak. I really can. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt, and it was hell on earth! Those days in NICU were the worst days of my life!

Amy said...

That would be heartbreaking, but the joy of having him with you, growing and more healthy everyday, I'm sure way outweighs that! Yeah!

I am pregnant with baby #2 and would love a ring sling to carry him/her in come this winter!

Kristin said...

what a sweet post! I would love to enter your giveaway too!

3cookieday said...

I would love to win a sling. Your little man is adorable. I love that he's sucking his thumb. Too cute!

Marlena said...

What a wonderful story! Health should never be taken for granted and I bet you count your blessings every single day! :)

I am addicted to baby carriers. I struggled with wearing my first child but hope that the second will be more willing! I'd love to win! Thanks for the chance! m_huston(at)hotmail(dot)com

Andrea said...

Beautiful! I would love to win this to wear my baby girl around in. Thanks so much for the oppotunity. Thanks.

paula h said...

I could use a new sling :)

hafner611 {AT} gmail {DOT} com

Meredith A. said...

Beautiful! I would love to have a ring sling for my little one that is on the way. I have heard that ring slings are great for any size baby!

Katie said...

Please count me in for the giveaway! I just had a baby girl and would love to win a sling for her! Thanks! :D

katiellloyd at yahoo dot com

VanderbiltWife said...

I think every day about the "what ifs" this one is a preemie and we have to spend all that time in the NICU. It's scary. I am glad your sweet little one is safe!

I am 6 months along and would love to have this for my little girl.

hockeyman said...

Wow...bless you all and the scientists that created the advanced neo-natal care we have today.

No giveaways for me please, unless I fit in the sling.

Jennifer said...

I love all types of slings! The Bjorn didn't work for us either.
I love your picture-its perfect picture of happiness!

Jennifer, Playgroups Are No Place For Children said...

Great post, even though cheapened it with your giveaway (kidding!).

Love the picture, nice photoshopping?!

Amanda said...

What a wonderful post and great giveaway. I would love to be entered.

MomlovesJason said...

I love wearing my baby and my washing machine just ate mine...

A Whole Lot of Nothing said...

OH MY GAH I love that picture! Really really LOVE.

Rebekah said...

I want this sling for my friend, who's premie not only was a premie, but does not have complete hands and feet, has a kidney problem, and is visually impaired. All through it, her parents are strong, praising God for her each and every day. And she is growing stronger each and every day. Thanks for your heartbreak post. It was wonderful!

reb.kog @ gmail dot com

Julie said...

I love the neutral color!

Christina.Kimberly said...

Oh my ! As a mama of 2 preemies, I know how that feels.

I would love that sling to carry my lil one.

Reeva said...

Great giveaway! I hope i'm the lucky winner :)

sadie-kate-08 said...

i would love to win this for my mom, she is always looking for the perfect sling! thanks!
sarah
sadiekate2001 (at) yahoo (dot) com

Zoeyjane said...

awwww. I used to get asked all the time if Isobel was a premie, cuz she was wearing one-month old clothes at 3 and 3 month olds at 6, and 6 at 12 and so on. Right now, she's finally moving out of some of her 12-18 month sizes, but with the talking and stuff, people don't think she's younger anymore...

I'm sorry that you had to witness him struggle so much.

Jody Reale said...

Makes me nostalgic for the bygone baby-wearing days of yore. Good times.

Luvreading7 said...

Oooh, I could really use this.

Thanks for the chance! :D

Malissa A said...

Love that picture - but don't have a need for the sling - the debate still continues in our house!

Hope you guys are all doing well!

Lady_MSnow said...

Slings are a wonderful way to carry little ones and toddlers around. Hope I win. :D

princessofsomething said...

I am so glad your sweet boy is doing well. And I'm glad you can overcome the heartbreak with the joy of being a mom. :)

No need to enter me in your drawing-- unless that puppy will hold an almost-four-year-old? LOL

Mom 2 To Boys said...

I am a sling addicted and would love a new one as we are hoping for a new little one soon! Thanks!

Qtpies7 said...

That is really a great post!
My friend had two premies. I convinced her to switch to a doctor that would TREAT her high blood pressure, and she is now past both of their birth dates in her third pregnancy! However, she is now on bedrest.
I'd love to give her a sling for her new baby that hopefully stays put a few more weeks.

Cmerie said...

I really, really need a sling. Baby #2 is due in November.

sherri419 said...

Your post made me cry!!! I can't imagine the pain and anguish you must have gone through. My BF is having a little girl soon and we are pretty sure she will be tiny since her mom is and her brother was. I would love to gift her with this sling. Thanks for the opportunity to win!!!

Jenny said...

I love ring slings!

the_other_alice_ (at) yahoo.com

layla said...

What a great post. Your Little Man is a cutie. So glad he is doing well now. Thanks for a great giveaway.
laylarenee[at]cfl.rr.com

Parker Family said...

Very adorable. I would love to win this. Thanks for the giveaway! trishblack(at)juno(dot)com

Anonymous said...

Love to have one! Thanks!

lily_fair@excite.com

Ellen said...

I would love a ring sling.. I have heard so much about them and would like to try one with my daughter :)

I must say I just loved that picture of you and your child!

Ellen said...

oops forgot to add my email - too_blue4u69 at hotmail dot com :)

taysmommy said...

I looove slings! Im currently ttc #2 and this would be prefect!

ryann

ry13_2000@yahoo.com

Chelsey said...

I'd love a ring sling. I've tried so many carriers that are uncomfy!
mybabyappleseed(at)yahoo(dot)ca

Bunny B said...

That's a great picture! I would love a ring sling too :) Thank!

bunnybx at gmail . com

FaithfulMommy said...

Oh my goodness, I could really use a Mai Tai or a ring sling. My baby girl wants to be carried all day long and poor Mommy's left hip is sore. Thanks for a generous giveaway.

faithfulmommy03(at)gmail(dot)com

Katrina said...

I would love to win! Thanks!

Someone Being Me said...

I have a preemie baby too. Born at 32 weeks 5 days in January 2007.He is a healthy 18 month old now. We are trying for a second and I live with the fear that I will have preterm labor with the second one. I would love to win a sling for my next little one who hopefully will make it farther along.

Alaina said...

That must have been so tough! Beautiful picture!

I would love to win this for our expected-through-adoption new little one. He is due next month!

alainamj (AT) yahoo (DOT) com

sunnymum said...

I haven't experienced such heartbreak personally, but my heart goes out to you for the struggles. Thank you for the chance to win such a nice sling. Hope you have a beautiful week!

momo3 said...

i would heart this ring sling . . . 3 out of the 4 of my lil ones were preemies . . . my heart goes out to you . . . what a sweet picture . . .thanks for sharing! kristen.

ryankristenwilson(at)msn(dot)com

Tara said...

I love slings. And I loved the first part of your post too- well said!

sxechc013 said...

what you wrote was amazing. i DO want the sling but i also wanted to let you know your writing is stupendis and i wish i could be as talented as you. thanks for giving me the oppertunity to read your wonderful things.

Sarah
Sxechc013@aol.com

KathyEller said...

I am sorry about your Little Man coming early--that must have been very scary!

I cnat use a lot of carriers too--not because of babies size but because of mine. Im really not that big! Honest!!!

Please enter me in the drawing for the ring sling :)

Thanks for a great giveaway!

kathy
eller@ilovejesus.net
www.handfulofellers.blogspot.com

cre82learn said...

I could use another sling ring. One to stay in the house, one to stay in the car. blessed5x at gmail dot com.

Jinxy said...

I'm 4 months pregnant a sling would be great.

CanCan said...

I am a carrier-a-holic! I'd love to win!

onlycancan at hotmail dot com

apronstringsandothertiesthatbind said...

My DIL just had a baby boy. She would get great use of the sling.

purehrt555 said...

My niece is due soon, and I am sure that she would love the sling. Thanks for the give-a-way.

(the pic is gorgeous!)
purehrt555(AT)yahoo(DOT)com

Krista said...

I want a sling like that! My best friend has one, I tried to make my own... not so great! ;)
teacherkrista at gmail dot com

Nicole T said...

I have a preemie too! Check her out at www.emolyn.blogspot.com she is now 5 months old and we always get looks like "I can't believe they are bringing that newborn baby out" When people ask how old she is I always say "she is 5 months old. Perfect and petite!" At 5 months she is only 9 pounds but its a far cry from the 2.5 pounds when she was born. We would sure love this sling, she is a cuddler!
blinkin104 at yahoo dot com

Nicole T said...

I have a preemie too! Check her out at www.emolyn.blogspot.com she is now 5 months old and we always get looks like "I can't believe they are bringing that newborn baby out" When people ask how old she is I always say "she is 5 months old. Perfect and petite!" At 5 months she is only 9 pounds but its a far cry from the 2.5 pounds when she was born. We would sure love this sling, she is a cuddler!
blinkin104 at yahoo dot com

EG said...

This would be great, thanks!

Sarah said...

I am all about baby wearing!
Thanks for your generosity and great giveaway!
Thanks for the chance to win!
sharvey(AT)connections-etc(DOT)net

ShaunJoy said...

Would love to win this. Thanks for the giveaway!

shaunjoy(at)juno(dot)com

Michelle said...

I would like to try a ring sling with my 5 month old.

sounds like your son had a rough beginning but is such a fighter!

lattemommy said...

Wonderful post. That little bundle of adorable can make all bad feelings go away, I bet.

I totally don't need the sling (right now, anyway, still debating #3) but I think it's a great giveaway. Good luck to all the people entering!

Amanda Perin said...

I would so appreciate a new ring sling for Baby #3! (On-the-way) I'm a big baby-wearer and would put it to great use!
Thanks for the opprotunity!

joeperin9[at]aol[dot]com

Kristan said...

my twins are on the little side too...i hate the guesses of how old they are!
andrewandkristan(at)hotmail(dot)com

Ebie said...

oh i would love this - baby #2 coming in Dec!

cmartin0055 said...

I want this please!

dolls123 said...

Thanks for the chance

luckydolls123[at]verizon[dot]net

Rockin' Mama said...

gorgeous...i'm a NICU nurse so I understand what you've gone through...

jasonncaryn at yahoo dot com

The Chatty Housewife said...

I want it! I could really use something like that around here. Thank you very much for the great giveaway! nw_wife(at)hotmail(dot)com

Molly C. said...

(((((())))))) I was very fortunate to have all 5 of my boys born full term, but have been there for friends with preemies. And at some point they catch up to their ages, and you wouldn't even know that they were preemies! Beautiful sling. My youngest is almost 5 months old...sob.....so we could really use this!

Alexandra Hancock said...

I could really use one of these. My little man is killing my back and arms.
alexandra dot hancock at gmail dot com

Uniquely Yours said...

I have one daughter she's three. I would love to win. Thanks! Make sure you stop by my site http://uniquelyyoursbyshay.blogspot.com for a chance to win a Princess Bracelet made by yours truely by 5 today.

Shay T.
shaythatcher(AT)yahoo(DOT)com

Aimee said...

Awww, i have three preemies, triplets born at 33 weeks! Your little man is soo cute, great pic! I would love the sling.

Stacy said...

I love babywearing!

ihchicky said...

I love your little poem. Very touching. Thanks for the chance. This sling would be great!

ihchicky(at)gmail(dot)com

lace said...

I would love to have a ring sling. The color is beatiful.

Al_Pal said...

Darling photo!!! xoxo

Amy said...

I want it - and I'm glad you see al the ways you've won with your child.

swinger of birches said...

What a precious story, glad to here it had a good ending. I'd love the sliing!

Timothy Sternberg said...

That sling looks rad.

Missy said...

I would love a sling for my newborn! If you haven't already given it away, I want to be in the running!

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